A conversation I had with a nice call-centre person from my bank, edited for brevity:

Me: I’d like to extend my overdraft, please.

CCP: Okay, Miss [lastname], and how much would you like to increase it by?

Me: Frankly, as much as you can give me.

CCP: So… £10,000?! [clearly messing around, as I’m never allowed to have more than £3,000.]

Me: *laughs* If you can persuade them…

CCP: Well, I’ll just go and check that with our other department


CCP: I’m sorry, but they’ve declined your request. They also say that they’ve seen no sign of any student loan coming into your account*, and that you won’t be able to apply again for another six months.

Me: [deadpan] Damn. Back to begging on the street for me, then.

CCP: [also deadpan] Oh, I’m sorry to hear that, Miss [lastname].

I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry. Whoever that person was, they did very well at amusing me, whilst telling me that no, I couldn’t have any money. Well done to my bank for hiring staff with a sense of humour. Although, not so well done for hiring staff who don’t know the difference between “Miss” and “Ms”. The bank have no excuse, because I registered with them as “Ms”.

*The bank wouldn’t have seen any sign of the loan, because the student loans company refuse to acknowledge that my student account exists.